It is not a surprising matter that views and actions are different from person to person and within the same person as well. So, it may be a minor thing that my opinions are changing with the course of time.
As a teacher, I've spent more than a decade with children. At the beginning, I believed in punishment for moulding children for a bright future. It lasted for about six\seven years, though decreasing in some degree, until the birth of my daughter. Her birth, in my view, has brought a U turn in my perspective.
Then I started reviewing my actions in the past and found most of them improper. At the same time, I found other's behaviour to my child very much unjust. For example, when she cries, they call her crybaby and make her angry. Is that fair? Why should they call her so? They think that by calling her that way, she'll stop crying but why can't they observe that it has no positive effect?
I have no good feeling when people tease my baby. Some say she looks pretty while being teased. But isn't that a type of exploitation? She repeats what is being instructed. People address her with the lowest type of respect (There are at least four types in Nepali but no type in English) , expect the highest one and chide at her at her address which they consider a great mistake but is in fact what they teach.
Children have attention seeking behaviour and want to be at the centre of every activity. Lack of good reponse makes them angry. I've seen for many times that children, at the door, shout 'May I come in, sir/ madam?' repeatedly but the teacher inside turns deaf. The same teacher feels the shadow of the principal! At home, they are neglected by the elders. When a child asks something, there is none to answer. Both the teachers and guardians feel irritated when the children ask the same question time and again or do not follow their instructions after being taught once. It is said that the age under five is the most fertile time for learning but most of the guardians think that it is the duty of the schools and it makes half of the valuable time useless. The remaining time is spoilt by the careless teachers who have a quarrell with the adminstrators for their salary.
Everyone must realize that there is no one in the world who dislikes praise, that it is free of cost, that it is one of the most vital factor to mould behaviour and, therefore, we shouldn't be greedy to praise anyone when the person makes some good job. But in most cases, we find people who want praise in abundance but are too greedy to utter a word for others. It is really pitiable to see people expecting so from children and getting annoyed when they don't get! Though surfacely, I praise highly when my child does something like making a circle or reciting Twinkle Twinkle or reminding for going to pee and she is so much overwhelmed that she wants to kiss! It makes me too much happy and sad at the same time for not realizing it in the past. And, at the same time, feel pity for those who don't realize it. Yes, I've realized it after the birth of my child but there are so many who are unaware of it even after growing up their children and, furthermore, there are people who understand the value of praise for their children but not for other's!
(Personal views, welcome for your suggestion.)
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